Thursday, January 28, 2010

1954 Letter to Michigan Groups on Dr. Low's Death

You might well imagine how difficult it was for Recovery members when Dr. Low died. I was very young but remember my mother crying into a wet face cloth. She sent me over to a neighbors shortly thereafter. I'm sure she was working on herself both with grieving and using her Recovery to deal with all that was ahead of her. What was going to happen to Recovery? People wanted to know! The following letter was to be read by Michigan group leaders at their meetings. I want to mention that this was 1954 and State Hospitals and the profession for the most part, have since changed quite a bit. I know there is always room for improvement but I think it is important to note the progress that has been made. We can especially look at Oregon State Hospital and what they have recently achieved there! You can see more about this on www.lowselfhelpsystems.org by clicking on "For Professionals" . Also, for newcomers, you may notice our old name was "Recovery, Inc." and that has changed since then. Our new name, Recovery International, reflects our presence in several countries. Wouldn't the good doctor be pleased!

Here is what went our to group leaders:

Brighton, Michigan
November 29, 1954

(Group Leaders: Please read the following letter -- or have it read -- at your next meeting; read it slowly, please. I can't tell you how much all of your wonderful letters have meant to me at this time. I'll thank you personally at our next leaders' meeting which will be held at St. Matthew's Methodist Church, Evergreen at W. Seven Mile Rd., Detroit, next Saturday, December 4 at 10 A.M.)

Dear Members: I wish I could visit each group personally to say what I have to say. Since this is impossible, I want to chat with you for a few minutes via this letter: The death of our beloved Dr. Low has been a real loss which defies description. However, I feel somehow that soul reaches out to soul at this time, and that we share a common grief.

Dr. Low was a medical genius who devised a system of psychotherapy that restores nervous and former mental patients to normal, healthy living. It is common knowledge that few great men live to see their works accepted by the world. We must accept the fact that this is average.

My message to you at this time is one of reassurance. Recovery, Inc., will continue to function just as it has in the past; we hope with an increasing amount of efficiency. Trained leaders both here and in Chicago have become experts in the practice of Recovery's methods. These people have the desire and the spirit to help others and because of this, there will be no slack in the training program. Phil Crane, our Executive Secretary, assures me that there are adequate funds in the treasury to carry on for a good long time. Should the need arise, I feel certain we can find a way to finance Recovery. Why Dr. Low took it upon himself to see that you and I should receive psychotherapy practically without cost is more than I can say, but it is a fact that he was our benefactor even in this matter. The sale of the literature which he toiled to produce helps to keep Recovery alive--but he also actually made up any deficit out of his own pocket . . . many years to the tune of thousands of dollars. This further attests to the man's greatness--whose love and concern for us transcended any earthly standards.
I would like you to consider the fact that we have never really had Dr. Low with us in Michigan except through his books and his records. We still have these. In Chicago they have carried on most successfully without his personal leadership since last July. So let me repeat: we who are now in Recovery are safe. Furthermore, anyone who finds his way to us through publicity or referral from a doctor will receive the full benefits of Recovery and will have the opportunity to get well. It will be simple for us to carry out this program, and let me assure you that I, for one, find it a most enjoyable and gratifying task.

I sincerely wish that this were our only concern. However, one thing preys upon my conscience. The system of psychotherapy now being used in our hospitals and by the profession in general is futile. It's approach is irrational and cannot possibly work except for a meager handful of patients. Therefore, thousands of people--yes, tens of thousands--are doomed to suffer and rot away. Surely, you and I, who know so well the agony of such suffering, cannot look away from this issue. We must take up the fight for professional acceptance of Recovery's methods and system of psychotherapy. Dr. Low carried on this fight for seventeen years--and failed. Now I feel dedicated to this purpose, and I hope that all of you will join forces with me here in Michigan. Shortly, I will get word to you how we will go about accomplishing this job. In the meantime, rest assured that you are safe in Recovery's hands. Dr. Low says there is only ONE nervous case and Recovery's methods can restore all to good mental health on a permanent basis. I genuinely feel that the bond between all of us is stronger still with the death of our founder. I send you my love and pledge my support to all of you.
Treasure Rice--Michigan Leader

Sunday, January 24, 2010

1956 Welcoming Address by Treasure Rice to Michigan Recovery Christmas Party

Our Christmas is now over. I thought I'd share with you an address Mother made to those attending the 1956 Michigan Christmas party. This was an exciting time to be on the ground floor and taking Dr. Low's work beyond Chicago. Michigan Recovery was really starting to "hum". Even though it was given in 1956 (she joined Recovery in 1947) I think her words will still inspire us today. Here is what she said:

I think it is especially appropriate that we folks in Recovery get together at this time of the year. For many of us it is a time for exchanging gifts, and I think that we have one of the most precious gifts of all to exchange -- and that is the gift of acceptance.

I could no doubt make this statement without fear of being challenged: Every one of us has felt the Stigma of our illness. Gut, you know, the shame I used to feel has largely been replaced with a real feeling of pride, because, honestly, I have found the folks in Recovery to be one of the grandest groups of people in this world. I’ve found you to be warm-hearted, sensitive and responsive – where else can you meet a more wonderful group of friends? So I’m really proud to be listed as one of us. And this is the gift we exchange – acceptance – not only of each other, but a feeling of respectability. I can remember that all my life I felt set apart, different, and there are times, even yet, when maybe I am with my own family – and suddenly again I will feel alone – set apart—different. But that is when this wonderful feeling comes welling up with in me, and I remember all of you, and I know that some where you too are having to control – and then I don’t feel alone any more – I feel that I do belong, really and that I’m not so different.

Another thing that makes me proud to be classed as a Recovery member is the fact that I think there is much courage – pound for pound – in this organization we call Recovery as you will find anywhere else in the world, and I’ll tell you why: We battle with a phantom! The thing we fight doesn’t even exist – and I’m speaking of course, of the Idea of Danger. Dr. Low says we are addicted to it, that it is an obsession with us. So we shadow-box, and live in the shadow of life – not sick enough to be put in a hospital for any length of time, and yet not well enough to take our place in life on a sustained basis. And only we who have been through it or are going through can realize how much courage it takes to overcome this foe – and only we can really know how formidable is this phantom enemy of fear that seems as real to us as if it were constructed of concrete and steel.

When it was suggested that I give this talk today, the committee asked that I give a brief resume of the year. What has happened in Michigan in Recovery this past year? I thought about it for a while and I thought, if I really wanted to make it brief it could be told in one word: Successful. Michigan has been very successful with its Recovery project this year. Many of you already know that Michigan has more paid members than any other branch. Recently another branch leader said to me, “Why is it that Michigan has been so successful? After all, people are people, wherever you go.” And I said, “maybe people are people—but no kidding—I think we have the most exceptional group of average people you will find anywhere!” [laughter] Every one of you, and many who are not here today, has been responsible for the growth and success of Recovery in Michigan. All of us have played a part in the total picture. What better time could we have than right now, however, to give credit to a group of people among us whom we call our leaders? These people have started groups I think without exception while they were still going through the discomfort of their own illness. They have borne the discomfort of discharging a group obligation at the sacrifice many times of their own personal inclination. I will ask each leader to stand and take a bow. Last night I went through this list and wanted to make a remark about each one of them, but two things prevent me from doing this: One—if I said even part of what is in my heart, we’d be here all night and tomorrow too. Second—what I have to say would only embarrass these people, because they are not looking for public endorsement.

May I ask that each leader, as he stands, instead of thinking about how he looks, or should he smile, etc. – that he silently give himself an honest endorsement for all the effort and control he has used, and all the discomforts he has borne and the spotting he has done in leading his group.

(The leaders’ list was read in its entirety and those who were present took a well-deserved bow.)

Before I finish, I have one more thing to add. Dr. Low and many others have labored to establish Recovery and to make it available to all who can use it. The literature is inexpensive and written in a simple language that most anyone can read and study. We are working hard toward starting more and more groups, so that Recovery training can be at our finger-tips, merely for the taking. But there is one factor that must necessarily be left up to each and every one of us. That is – just how much will each of us take advantage of this opportunity offered us in Recovery? Several weeks ago, I heard a story that I think illustrates this very well:

Two scientists were exploring on the Sahara Desert, when they came upon a strange pyramid that was not charted on their maps. When they went to enter the pyramid, they noticed an inscription over the doorway: He who takes of my sands will be sorry. We who does not will be sad!!” The two scientists went into the pyramid and found it to be dark inside, but they explored it as best they could. When they were ready to leave, they thought of the mysterious inscription over the entrance. The one scientist thought he would not risk taking any of the sand, but the other one curiously reached down and in the inky blackness scooped up a handful of the shifting sand on the floor of the pyramid. When they returned to their camp, one of the most dreaded events that can take place on the desert began to occur. A sandstorm raged all night, and the scientists struggled to hang onto their possessions. In the morning after the storm had subsided, they emerged from their camp. When they surveyed the vast expanse of desert before them, they saw that the pyramid had disappeared, buried in the sands for perhaps another two or three thousand years. Suddenly they remembered the peculiar inscription. The scientist who had taken the sand put his hand into his pocket and drew out his clenched fist. When he opened it, there to his amazement, glistening in the sun was a handful of DIAMONDS. Then he was sorry – sorry he hadn’t taken two handfuls. And the other scientist was sad, because he had taken none.

The sands of opportunity in Recovery lie all around us. Let’s not be content to take one handful or two handfuls, but let’s dig deep and take all we can carry away! I hope that you will have a peaceful holiday, especially within - not only now but always.

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Not Being a China Doll: Response Versus Reaction

1/17/10

Not being a China Doll: Response Versus Reaction

I was recently reading a letter someone had sent to me. It’s a copy of one of Mom’s letters. As I read it I thought of how often she spoke to me about this idea of being too thin skinned. I think the first time she mentioned it I was probably in High School. She said “You don’t want to become a China Doll that everyone has to tip toe around for fear of breaking you.” Her letter to this person said as much, so this is a good way to share it with you and I consider it from Treasure Rice to any of us. Here is her letter:

Dear One,

You are definitely getting to a place where you are not as sensitive to comments and behavior of others. I remember very well the years I worked on “using” the “slings and arrows” as a means of strengthening my ability to not react. In other words I would spot my fearful and angry response as just that – a response to an event. Then I would immediately (or very rapidly) see that I didn’t let it become a reaction. This meant catching that first feeling, sensation, thought and/or impulse and turning it into a plus for me.

One day I was in the tub taking a bath. My husband hollered at me about something I had not done. His tone was angry and his words “put me down.” I had an immediate response – a surge of anger and the thought response “How dare he speak to me like that?” So I immediately decided not to let it become a reaction for me. I looked at it as a wonderful opportunity for me to develop my ability to take my place in life as one who is not super sensitive to such events. I had the thought, “This is a plus for me. He’s average to have temper and I’m not really threatened." I forget what I said to him, but I really remember how I was able to keep it to the realm of a response. During that time of my training I paid particular attention to:

fearful and angry response

VS

fearful and angry reactions

dividing them into two separate compartments.

The responses you cannot control – either you respond or you don’t (that is have a response or not) but if you are able to pay close attention to the difference and look upon each one as a real chance to develop and strengthen your ability to “take it” without becoming a person who goes on reacting to these responses like an automatic machine then you are self-led.

Ordinary opinion is that we shouldn’t let people “get away with it” or “if I give an inch, he’ll take a mile” but it’s really just the opposite.

This doesn’t mean I don’t assert myself at times – I do. I learned to do that too in Recovery – but I’m not the helpless victim of the responses nature furnishes me with when it counts. I can speak up – but these times are few and far between.

I can see you getting to the place where you are much less apt to react. That reaction doesn’t even have to be voiced but can be the working up process inside. A sense of humor and the inner smile is such a saving grace and you sure have that.

Love,

Treasure

A Little History First...


1/17/10

For quite some time I have been wondering just how to write about my mother, Treasure Rice. She had so much experience and wisdom from a well-lived, long life. She used that life to learn more about herself, raise a family, be a great wife to an adoring husband and try in the best way she knew, to help alleviate the suffering of people with some form of mental or emotional stress/disorders. Call it what you will, but it is all suffering when one experiences a “break-down”, panic, or has some nervous/mental illness or brain disease. There continues to be new descriptive words for so many maladies. When Mom first put her toe in this water, she was indeed what was once called a “psychoneurotic.” I know she had depression, anxiety and other difficulties. In Recovery terms, she called herself a “nervous patient.” It was in 1947 her life came to a head. According to the therapists she was consulting, the outlook was bleak for her. She even began to wonder if it was time to give up. Then, for her, a miracle happened. She discovered Abraham Low, MD, a neuropsychiatrist in Chicago who told her she could get well! He was developing a system that was helping others and would help her. That was the big moment. The turning point in her life that would come to help not only herself, her family, but thousands of people over time.

Much has been written by Dr. Low and can be viewed and bought on the Abraham Low Self-Help Systems web site. There is also a biography, My Dear Ones. It gives a lot of Dr. Low’s story and some of mother’s story as well.

This blog will have the purpose of sharing with you, my family, friends or those who are seeking to evolve, mother’s words that she passed on to me and to others. Some come directly from what Dr. Low told her and some from what she learned. She was very good at synthesizing both information and experience and then sharing it through both her own words and being an example of how one might “be.”

There is at present, no order to the letters I’m sharing, but I hope I can glean something more than memories and lessons. Hopefully some of her essence will flow to you as well. I will try to keep each entry short with a hint in the title of what she wrote.

I will also share my own experience of having panics, anxiety, depression and how I handled it and who helped. Of course this is a lifetime of learning, so, as the saying goes, “the beat goes on”. After I had my breakdown, Mom was telling me one day about how after practicing and integrating the Recovery system, we are often better than we were before we broke. I recall her saying Dr. Low said through our practice we were a human beings "plus." Please remember that when I say something like "I recall", that, it is going back many, many years and certainly is not anything authoritative! This blog may look and feel different, but I hope it will be of some interest or help to the reader. It has been so interesting for me to "recover" my mother in her letters. The name of the blog "recoveringtreasure" is a play on both of our names and our inner work. So here it goes!